Expressions!!

Well its the first one in my "The Agony of Being" series.
AVERAGE , a self imposed label. But a just and a deserving one( finally getting something i rightfully deserve). A label i desperately tried to shed over the years but its a sticky one and you just can't wriggle out of it.
I always wonder why i have to be on the borderline between the average and the lower rung? I think it would have been a lot better had i ended up on the lower rung cause then i would have no expectations to live up to , no promises to fulfill and more importantly no souls to disappoint.
Is it really that bad ?? I always think so . When you are in the mediocre area people don't expect much from you and whatever you give away is sort of a bonus. Not a great position but a better one.
The biggest problem is the problem of Disappointment . Its really tough to end up disappointing the ones you really love and its compounded by the fact there was nothing more you could have done.
So what is my pick for the best or rather the worst???
The average intellect is the winner hands down. Although its a relative label and there are a lot of people who will love to be in my position but still i think its the worst part. Its something that have always let me down when it mattered the most. On this front i really would have preferred the mediocre option if there was one. Sounds outrageous but trust me its better than the current position. Or so it seems so only???
It all sounds very melancholy . I know that but sometimes you just have to get things out.
I do think like that, very rarely though, and i think its an honest attempt to accept things you don't like rather then hiding them behind the veil.